Sayonara
by kojika
Summary: Candice's reflexions on all that happened and her feelings of Phantom...MAJOR SPOILER! AKT 152!


Sayonara

By Sanzaki Kojika

Disclaimer: I do NOT in any way, shape, or form own MAR as much as I would like to ; and, actually…I'm not even that big a fan of the Chess XD I mean I like them, but most of my favorite characters are the good guys. Anyways, I was having a conversation with someone through e-mail about some of the later chapters and when this brought up….I got inspired to write with it. So, this will contain MAJOR SPOILERS! And when I say MAJOR, I mean MAJOR! This stuff is from like AKT 150ish area…not sure the exact number…but yeah..never mind! I just grabbed it XD AKT 152!. My first MAR fic is soo random XD Anyways, Pairing: Candice x Phantom (one sided and from Candice's POV)

Nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

I really hadn't ever given it too much thought. No matter what, you were always there. No matter what, I could always be by your side. Even though I had lost, you still let me stay, you still let me live. You were the one who saved me from the darkness; you are my one true love.

As I stood by your side once more, after you lost not only physically to that short boy from another world, but you lost yourself as well…I felt like I had slipped into a dream world. It wasn't long before he arrived with all his friends. I couldn't hear much of what they were saying; I didn't want to! But, I knew the inevitable was finally coming. After all, you were no longer alive in the sense of the word.

In fact, you hadn't been really alive for a while. When you were truly alive, you spent your life under the control of the King. And, even after you escaped his control in death, he just wouldn't let you die. And soon, you were brought back again to play the villain. But, I know deep down inside you are the hero. Why? Because you saved me from the darkness. You saved Rolan, you saved Chimera, you saved Peta…in a way, you saved us all. You are helping to save that boy and his friends as well. And, that's why we follow you with all of our heart. But, you were never truly saved yourself; you were never truly you. And now, that boy gave you the chance to do so, and you have nothing left. No will to live, no hope for tomorrow, nothing. You are more a zombie now than you have ever been before. And it pains me so much to see you that way. If you have to live like this…I think I'd rather see you die in peace!

You greet them like nothing is different, but I can hear your heart and I know that isn't true! There is a sad longing there. A longing to be free! I wish it was I who could make you so, but I know that I can't. I am powerless…I will always be so. All I can do is stand beside you and act brave and strong, even though my heart is crumbling.

"You finally came here……Ginta………Alviss-kun……" You still act like you are in total control. It's hard for me to stand silent besides you. I want to reach out and help, but there is nothing I can do. Your face barely shows the signs of your pain, but I can read them loud and clear. I can feel them in my heart…I know you better than you know yourself…better than I know myself.

They are done talking and the handsome one steps forward. In his hand he holds a brilliant shining key. Even though I don't know what it is really, I already fear it. I know it is something that will harm you. And, though it may free you…I still don't want to see you die. My heart is aching…I am so confused! What should I do? What should I think?

"You go on ahead," he says to his friends, "Phantom has already lost." No! He's wrong! You haven't lost yet…have you? Deep in my heart I know the answer…but it pains me so to believe it could be true.

"Alright, let's go!" the witch girl is quick to shout. She knows what is going to happen and she knows that it isn't her fight. She has faith in her allies. The little dog is right behind her. He, too, must share her thoughts.

"This way!" The boy hesitates for a moment to look back at his friend before making a move to leave. I don't doubt he trusts in his friend's strength…but he still may have a heavy heart. That boy still thinks so purely!

The others leave, and it is simply you, I…and that man. He slowly approaches us. I have never been so scared in my life! It is not death for myself I fear; it is your death. That is when my life will be truly over! I cannot imagine my life without you. Even though I'm worthless, you have let me stand by your side and called me strong. I want to help you, I want to fight for you! Every step he draws closer is every second _it_ draws closer. I can feel my heart pounding in my chest. I don't want you to die like this.

"Do you intend to fight me?" Your voice rings clearly yet your eyes have gone dull. It hurts me so much to see you like this. I want to lessen your pain! Please, tell me! Let me know how to stop it! But, I am not in your world right now. Only he is. And still you continue talking as if I'm not there beside you, "Alviss-kun."

"If you're going to, I'll be your opponent!" Finally there is something I can do. As I scream and jump to protect you, you simply brush my offer away.

"It's alright, Candice." Already, you don't need me? Please let me help! I don't say anything though, and I step back. I know when not to intrude. But, still…I wish I could do something for you!

He just smirks at us, as if he knows some big secret…I am afraid. I know he holds a secret within his hands…in that tiny key. And there is nothing I can do. He moves ever closer, "I have no intention of fighting. I will destroy you."

As the two of you chatter away, the world around me is still. I know what's coming. I want to jump out and protect you, but I know you no longer desire to cling to this world. What you want is freedom. And, there's no way I can deny you that. You, who have given me the same. It is all I can do for you now. I will stay by your side until the very end. At least, let me do that for you…because…that is all I can do. All I can give you is myself.

I glance up to watch as he slowly lifts his hand. Time seems to slow down and the world falls silent around us. Slowly, the hand moves ever higher, and then the key slips from his fingers and flies, embedding itself deep into your chest. You almost looked surprised. I wonder, does it hurt? Please! Let me know your pain!

"Phantom?" I call out your name, but it is not me you are seeing. It is only him and the memory of the boy you fought so hard to defeat and failed. You seem to know what the key is and where it came from…something about a ghost ship, but my heart is too clouded to hear anything more and make sense of it. All I hear is my heart pounding in my ears. All I can see is the blurry world through my teary eyes and you illuminated in the middle. Your shining image is the only thing my heart can still make out clearly.

You still continue to talk, even though it must pain you! I can barely bear to look. That key sticking out of your chest…! Then, suddenly you close your eyes and say to me, "I'm sorry, Candice…I'm finally going to rest." And even though I know it's what you want, it still pains me. No...please don't go! I want to reach out to you! But, finally, you reached out to me! Please let me help you!

"No! I don't want that Phantom!" I cry out, though I know my words will have no effect. Still, I try to call out to you, "Please don't disappear!" But, I can already tell you are drifting away, leaving me behind once more. I hate it in this solitude!

The world around me falls still once again, and no longer am I part of the moment. I watch in tears as the man speaks than slowly reaches forward and takes the handle of the key. He slowly turns it. For a moment…everything stands still. Maybe nothing will happen…? I pray, but I know I am being stupid! I already know what will happen… Then, suddenly, you're gone…in an explosion of dust. And you slowly blow away…leaving your throne empty. But, to me and everyone else who has managed to survive, you have left us all empty. There are so few of us left and all of us bear deep holes in our hearts.

I fall to my knees in disbelief, staring at the remnants of dust. You just can't be gone! You just can't leave me here alone! I need you, we all need you! Without you…we are nothing! We are bound to fall apart! We still believe in you, we still love you! I love you! You can't just leave me alone in this horrible world! I didn't even get to say good-bye! Not the way I wanted to! Please…come back…my heart feels heavy and it aches with every thought…

"Phantom…" I'm not even sure whose voice that is. Is it mine…or is it that man's…? I don't really care! I just wish this was a dream and I'd wake up! But, I know it's not going to happen…I know what I just saw was reality… The tears don't stop coming. That man stands over me for a moment then turns away, rolling up his sleeve. I just want him to leave, that hateful man! How dare he kill the man I love! I want to do something, get revenge, anything! But…I know Phantom wouldn't want that. Besides, that man was also hurt by Phantom and saved by him in the end, too…those eyes aren't ones of hatred…

I slowly glance up through my tears to watch the man walk away. No, it is not this man that I should hate. He is the one who freed Phantom, as Phantom did to me. I'm sure Phantom wouldn't want me to hate him. I'm sure Phantom would want to thank him if he could! There is only one man I should hate! The man I should hate is King, the one who has cause us all so much pain. He has done nothing but cause everyone pain! It is not only MARHeaven who has felt it, it is also Kaldea, it is also the Chess…he has left deep scars across everyone! He is the only one who should die for hatred!

I slowly come to my feet. Even though it hurts me, even though I'm sad, I will live on with this memory and become stronger. For you I will live one with this precious freedom you've given me…Because, I know that's what you would want, ne, Phantom…?

And even though I'll never know if you loved me….I know I will always love you…

Sayonara…

Nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

Author Notes: um…yeah XD I haven't a clue as to what to say about that…but for those of you who read this and wanted to know the spoiler, yes indeed Phantom dies at the hands of Alviss using that key that Ginta as given way back when he fought Giromu and was with "tom" back on the ghost ship (so like vol 4 stuff). But, the elder from Kaldea explains to Ginta how it's used AFTER the final War Game round is over. In the final War Game round, Ginta fights AND defeats Phantom, destroying most of that bandaged arm of his…it's pretty much a mutated compilation of ARMs. Heh. But, after he loses…Diana, who has been controlling him all this time, lets go of her control over him, considering him useless, and he's finally allowed to speak for himself. All the references to King in this story? Well, King is actually the one who has been controlling Diana and everything (and I'm pretty sure he controlled Phantom 6 years before…so it makes it sound). But yeah…that's why. Diana isn't a free player in this game, either.

One last thing to clarify…the dialogue? I actually ran down into my basement and pulled out the volume of Shounen Sunday that had AKT 152 in it, so I did a quicky translation on what was being said between the three of them. There is a lot more talk between Alviss and Phantom but as 1) I was being lazy and didn't want to translate that big blob of text O.O , and 2) I had a feeling that was the least of Candice's focus at the time…I left it out. But, pretty much, they're just taunting each other and then explaining the key. Some of the end stuff and all of Candice's thoughts are NOT in it though.

Thank you all for reading! This is my first MAR fanfic (which is my biggest obsession as far as series go) and since I picked some characters I like but am not obsessed with, it was kinda…interesting. heh. Sorry about the long explanation! But as I am the translator for PKR, I am fully aware that only up to AKT 119 is out for download at this time (though I have up to 130 fully translated).


End file.
